Coping With Death: Just Another Day in America

coping with loss in America

There has been so much death lately. There is war and so many of the people we know and love are getting killed. The way it’s talked about these days makes it seem like it isn’t important and that there is no emotion involved. The news reports it as just another day in America.

On March 17th, 2015, I lost a friend, a member of the National Guard and the soul mate to one of my best friends.

The first thing people were asking me was, “Did he die in country?”

He was killed in a motorcycle accident on his way to work in a hit and run, but does that make it any more or less of a loss?

Does the family have more or less comfort with it being close to home? Why does it matter WHERE or HOW he was lost?

I could never imagine what my friend V is going through right this very moment. My brain cannot comprehend that he is gone and that she has to raise their 3 beautiful girls by herself. I sit here in shock as I realize that he was only 33 years old.

We all know that there is help within the military to cope with loss of a loved one and that the spouse and family should seek that advice as soon as possible.

What about the friends? The battle buddies? The neighbors?

You may not realize it, but the loss of someone in your world can have a HUGE affect on you.

I believe that everyone you come in contact with makes a difference in your life and that you make a difference in their life, too. It can be a good difference or a bad difference, but still a difference.

I only knew my friend for a short few years at our last station, but that family had a huge impact on my life and my family. Besides the fact that he helped teach my daughter how to eat green beans, he also showed me friendship and V and Aron showed me the love they had for each other. Their passion for each other is something I wanted in my marriage. They showed me that no matter what happens always be there for someone.

I took this loss very hard and it got me thinking why I would take it that way. Why am I hurting for the loss of this man that I haven’t spoken to in 2 years?

My mind is not grasping any real reasons.

When I look back on pictures, I see that I never realized the impact they had on my life back then.