Military Life

I’m Not Ignoring You. I’m Just Getting By.

Dear Friends and Family,

It’s not you. It’s me.

No, this isn’t a break up letter, but rather an attempt to explain why I might seem, well, weird lately. At times, I don’t answer texts or calls or when I do, seem distracted and short. Other days, I want to talk and talk.

I keep you guessing like a wayward lover—some days I’m up for a shopping date and girls’ night out, and other days I’m in my jammies 24/7. You’re understandably confused, and I just need to let you know: I’m doing what I can to get by right now.

You know my husband is in a Very. Bad. Place. And though I know you love him too and worry about him, you’re still able to get on with life and forget sometimes.

I can’t.

The deployment ache is real. There’s an underlying sadness to everything. The world is painted in faded, watercolor shades for me right now. My head is cloudy, I don’t think as clearly, and some days I feel on the verge of tears every waking hour.

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