3. Be patient

It is nearly impossible to foresee what the military has in store for your future. Recognize that in order to move ahead you may be forced to take two steps forward and one step back.

4. Be open to help

Seek help from others.

Help can come from many different venues: professional counselors, doctors, support groups, religious affiliation, confidants, Family Support Center, Life Skills Center, your unit, clergy, family, friends (to name just a few).

5. Be proactive

It is critical for military spouses to develop their own unique set of coping skills. Exercise, meditation, career goals, journaling, hobbies, spiritual growth, volunteer work, mindfulness. Find what works for you.

Even if you do not believe you are “stressed;” develop these skills for later use. I guarantee you will need them at some point in your military tenure. Life’s transitions can bring with it many surprises as reported by a military spouse I encountered who had recently transitioned from active duty.

“The truth is your family needs you, your spouse needs you, and the military needs you.”

Military spouses’ service to our country is heroic. But that role comes at a great cost. Do not let that price be your family, your self-worth or your general well-being.

At times, we ARE all capable of superhuman performance, but at other times, we all feel frustrated and overwhelmed.

Knowing when and how to ask for help is important.

The roller coaster range of emotions experienced by many military spouses is a natural function of the role we play in supporting those who participate in military service. Without such support, the military as we know it would cease to function.

The truth is your family needs you, your spouse needs you and the military needs you. Although few recognize what you do, or appreciate the trials and tribulations you face, the truth is none of us are superheroes, but rather one of the thousands of people whose lives are impacted by the daily challenges encountered by members of military families.

Dr. Kendra Lowe served 6 years as an active duty Air Force officer, and now 14.5 years as a military spouse. She has a Bachelor’s of Science in Behavioral Science from the Air Force Academy, Masters of Science in Counseling from the University of Great Falls, Educational Specialist in School Psychology from Valdosta State University, and now a Doctorate in Educational Leadership with a focus in Psychological Studies from Valdosta State University.

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