If military life hasn’t taught you this yet, it is only a matter of time before you realize that this life sure does have a way of throwing lemons right at you, when you least expect it and when your quota of lemons is already well met. As military spouses, we do not lack the opportunity to complain. No, we can quite easily drum up some way to look negatively on our circumstances. Who can blame you? This road you are on is in fact a bumpy and windy one, with lots of potholes no less. What seasoned military spouses will most likely tell you though is that the best way to ride out this military life, is not to “ride it out” at all. We must make the most of every moment, each day and each chapter that comes our way. We must turn our “negative” circumstances into positive opportunities. Here are 5 ways how to do that:
1: Don’t Play the Victim
So often the circumstances that are thrown our way make us feel out of control and as if we are being pulled around without a say. The fact is, that is quite true. Yes, we don’t have much of a say. We aren’t really in control nor are we really the one driving. The key is to control what you can. You can control your feelings, emotions, satisfaction and peace with each circumstance. Get in control of your own thoughts and find things to be positive about. Look around and find something that you find fulfilling. Instead of feeling like you were dragged around into your situation, find a reason and purpose of why you are where you are and make the best of it!
2: Find Joy
There is a very practical way to make the best out of your circumstances. Find what brings you joy and pursue that. Even amidst the toughest of times, if we can hold on to one or two things that bring us joy and pursue those things, we can in a way put on blinders to the negative and focus our time and emotions on that thing or things that bring us joy! There are just as many positive opportunities as there are negative, the challenge is in finding them. They don’t often appear as we expect them. You may need to look at things a bit differently to realize it, but the opportunities are there.
3: Feed the Positive
It is easy to find things that make us upset, riled up, or depressed. In fact, there are so many things around us that we can use as fuel that we can feed into our bucket of negativity. We can look around and say, “Yup, there’s another thing to add to my bucket!” The problem with this way of going about this military life is, at the end of the day all we have is a bucket of negativity. If we can focus on feeding the positive instead, we will have moments, memories, and a positive outlook on life that can not even fit in a bucket!
4: Control Your Talk
Believe it or not, what you say can affect how you feel. It is well known that what we talk about is often reflective of how we feel. What is often understated though is the affect that what we talk about has on how we feel. By constantly talking negatively about our circumstances, we are reiterating and implanting on our heart those thoughts and feelings. If you can challenge yourself to talk only positive words, you will find the results life changing. By reiterating positive words out loud, they will slowly start to embed and imprint on your heart!
5: Enjoy the Now
Life is happening now. Understanding that can be monumental to your joy and positive outlook on life. So often we hold on to what is next or around the corner. We hold on to what we hope the future looks like instead of enjoying the here and now. We will miss out on the opportunities that are right in front of us if we are constantly waiting for things around us to change. Change your outlook, your mindset, and your joy and you will see that the right perspective can bring about positive opportunities around you!
