5 New Experiences You'll Have Living Off Base For the First Time

I have a confession to make. This time last year, I made my very first electric bill payment. I also experienced my very first door-to-door solicitor, and had my very first freak out moment when I realized that I was no longer living in a gated community where there was someone guarding the gate with a gun. Yep. At this time last year, I felt like a teenager who was learning how to take on responsibility for the first time on her own. Except I wasn’t a teenager... I was the tender (cough, cough) age of 35! My husband and I have been married since we were 19 and we have ALWAYS lived on base through his entire career up to this point. When he received his PCS orders, he said: “Hey, this is my ‘twilight tour’,” (which I guess is mil-speak for his very last enlistment) “I think we should rent a house off base.” We had always lived on base in a town home or duplex set-up. His thought was that he didn’t want to live ‘attached’ to anyone if we had the choice. We have always had fantastic neighbors, but I could see his reasoning. Especially when most of the time our bedroom wall was attached to their bedroom wall. Occasionally this made for some very awkward glances exchanged in the mornings (especially after a deployment!) Now, I’m usually a go-with-the-flow kind of girl, so I said “Sure! I mean, it can’t be THAT different, right?” Well, as it turns out, I was HALF right. Let’s be clear: different does not equal bad . Different equals different. And while I truly am a go-with-the-flow kind of girl, I’m not really a fan of change all that much. (cue gasp) I mean, hey…I don’t have to like change in order to embrace it! So I decided to challenge myself and look at this situation with an open mind so that I could grow and learn (and also so that no one would revoke my go-with-the-flow card!). Here are just a few ‘firsts’ I experienced in my first year living off base: 1. Expenses Living on base afforded us the opportunity to NEVER have to worry about additional expenses for necessities such as electricity, water and trash pick-up. We love our new house, but in hindsight, we hadn’t really considered just how much of an impact those additional expenses would make on our wallets. So, what did we do? Yep, you guessed. We chose to rent a home that was the exact amount of BAH in our area. We never even thought that maybe we ought to find a home where the BAH would cover the rent AND utilities. Hindsight really is 20/20. 2. Solicitors I’m not sure why I hadn’t realized that we had never experienced this when we lived on base. It could be because solicitation is prohibited aboard military installations. Now our doorbell rings at least twice a week! I have encountered people selling cable, yard services, newspapers, pest control, Girl Scout cookies, and two nice young boys who wanted to talk to me about how much God loves me. Aside from snatching up some Thin Mints and not wanting to be rude to those two nice boys who wanted to save my soul from eternal damnation, I said no thank you to everyone else and always felt guilty when I shut the door. I had no idea that was even something that people felt guilty about! 3. Stereotypes We just can’t seem to get away from this one, can we? Yes, apparently there are stereotypes about being a renter. I haven’t personally experienced this one and I wasn’t even aware of the concept until fairly recently. A fellow Mil-Spouse mentioned that there were negative comments being made on a social media thread about renters. I couldn’t understand why. Apparently, people who rent their homes vs. owning them outright are viewed as messy, lazy slobs who inevitably bring property values down. What? That’s a THING? Yea. My husband and I, as well as many other military families, have chosen to postpone joining the home-buyers club until he is retired from the military. That is us being fiscally responsible for our future, yet it would appear that this elite group of homeowners has decided to lump us in with a generalization rather than take the time to think that one through. What disturbed me the most was learning that some neighborhood communities have ‘no renter’ policies. I had no idea! It’s already hard enough to find housing on or off base, but that could DEFINITELY add to the frustration, I’m sure. 4. Bubble Living This phenomenon means exactly what it says. I believe that my family may have been living with a false sense of security on base. My kids rode their bikes to the convenience store, walked to school or their friend’s houses. I was completely comfortable with them walking at night even. I’m not sure that I would have allowed them to do those things when they were younger, if we had lived off base. The first month after we moved, they both got on this hyper-vigilant safety kick. My daughter said "We need to get a guard dog in case there is an intruder", to which my son replied "Let’s get a Taser gun just in case." I kept thinking, ‘why can’t we just lock the door?’ I had NEVER considered just how much their perception of safety was wrapped around having military police guarding our gates. 5. Transition All in all, I’m pleased that we chose to live off base this time around. Yes, there are challenges that I hadn’t anticipated or even think of. It’s very different, and that is something that my family and I need to start getting used to. In about 2.5 years, my husband will retire from military service and we will be transitioning into civilian life. Living off base while he is still on active duty is helping us to slowly prepare for that change . What about you? What kinds of things have YOU learned or experience living off base for the first time? Connect with us on Facebook!

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