5 Things I Have Only Done Once as a Military Spouse

1. Lived on the Third Floor

When my spouse was at BOLC at Fort Benning we rented this AMAZINGLY beautiful 1-bedroom luxury apartment off-base. It was affordable, in a safe neighborhood, had hardwood floors and the newest appliances. The catch? It was three floors up. No elevator. You ever try to take a Sam’s Club shopping trip upstairs by yourself? I have. Not to mention that we always do DITY moves- so you know carting boxes up and down multiple flights of stairs when moving in and out. My calves have never looked better though.

2. Unpacked Everything

I know people who always unpack everything no matter what and bless those people. I did it once. Granted with our 2nd PCS we had only been at the new duty station for three weeks when we found out he was TDY’ing in three months, so I hadn’t even unpacked everything anyways. We knew he was going on another TDY mission before we got to this latest duty station, so my walls are bare and plastic totes occupy my living room. I did break down and tape a picture on the fridge because I needed something to make this place feel a little like my own before we vacate it.

3. Trusted the Systems in Place to Function Correctly and in a Timely Manner

I’m sure many of you can relate to this. I almost didn’t get my DEERs card. My spouse was in BOLC when I moved to be with him and so he couldn’t go to the DEERs office with me. Fear not, there is (or at least there was in 2015) a form that could be notarized and brought to the office to replace my husband. So we went to FedEx over the weekend, got the form notarized, and I had an appointment for the following week (I had been using visitor passes to get on and off base). I arrive in the office and the worker gives me a weird look when she realizes I am alone and not a soldier. She asks where my spouse is, and I hold up the form and make my argument that the website said I could bring in the form instead because he was in training and could not just take time off to come to the DEERs office. She argued back and forth with me for a few minutes, telling me that the website was wrong, and I needed him there with me. But then she went and talked a manager and found out they COULD accept the form, and I finally got my ID. It also took Finance 8 months and a PCS move to update BAH so that I was accounted for.

4. Lived in an RV

So I was working on a college degree in FL while he was stationed in South Carolina. We thought that’d be a great time to save some money on rent. We bought ourselves a used RV and he lived in that while the dog, Otto, and I stayed in my parent’s guest room. Who doesn’t love camping? I had a hammock and we did camp fires. It was a great experience and I’m so glad we did it. However, things got cramped when Otto and I came home for the summer. I was too short for the outdoor stove. It got too hot if I used the indoor oven. Then, the air conditioner went out in July 2019 and Otto and I had to make an emergency drive to FL so he could stay with my parents and my spouse had to install a new $400.00 air conditioner. FYI, RV Air Conditioner Repair Personnel work regionally and are booked out months in advanced, especially in July in the South. We lasted a whole year and half; but, when it came time to PCS to Fort Hood, TX (and we knew I’d be home more often) we opted for apartment living once more.

5. Got up at 2am to go onto Base and Watch my Spouse Complete a Field Mission

This was waaayyyy early in my military spousedom (is that even a word?). He had been in the field for two or three weeks and the spouses and SOs were invited to watch the culmination of their field experience. This involved getting up at 2am and driving 20 minutes onto base and finding some random parking lot, loading onto a bus, and riding with the other SOs to the middle of nowhere Fort Benning, and walking up to the roof of a building. It almost sounds like the beginning of a bad horror movie. I love my spouse and am proud of all he does, but after doing all that, I couldn’t even distinguish which one he was running around down below. I think I saw him for two minutes after everything was said and done.

What are some of things that you’ve experienced or done that you won’t do again?

Tamala Malerk:
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