Myth #3: People have control over their eating disorders.
People don’t choose to have eating disorders, and they aren’t a cry for attention or a phase someone is going through. Telling a person with an eating disorder to “just eat” or that they don’t need to lose weight is unhelpful and sometimes damaging. The disease may appear to be only about food or wanting to lose weight, but it has more to do with wanting control over one’s feelings, emotions, or overwhelming life circumstances. It’s much more complex than a desire to be thin.
Eating disorders are multifaceted and are caused by a variety of physical, emotional, and social issues. Factors that may contribute to eating disorders include: low self-esteem, depression, genetics, troubled personal relationships, prior victimization such as physical or sexual abuse, and the aforementioned cultural pressures and norms that equate someone’s worth with their physical appearance.
Instead of pressuring someone to eat, let your loved one know that you’re there for them and want to help them throughout the recovery process, whatever that may be for them. If you’re at a loss for words, simply being a good listener or telling someone who is suffering, “You’re not alone,” can make an enormous impact.