Quit the Comparison
I’m a stress-eater. On any given day after a long run, I will drive to the bakery to pick up a dozen doughnuts and proceed to consume at least four. Then I nibble. And I nibble some more. And I am ASTOUNDED the next day when, by golly, I’ve GAINED WEIGHT! I think it’s my scale…
When I asked my friend (whose spouse is also deployed) if she had been running, she responded, “I’m not allowed to. I don’t eat enough right now to healthily be able to long-distance run.” Of course, my jaw-drop could be heard ‘round the world. Here, two women in similar situations responded so differently, even opposite from one another. We could both bitterly berate each other behind backs or wallow in self-grief that “SHEEEE doesn’t struggle like I do.” But, as public speaker and religious leader Dieter F. Uchtdorf stated: “When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, please apply the following: Stop it!”
We are individuals, respectively apples and oranges. Peaches and pears. Not only do we differ in how we look and how we act, but we are each made up of different elements, and we grow and nourish others in different ways. We respond as such to change and to tumultuous situations. We each develop and grow at different rates during deployments and under pressure.
But together we are military spouses, one and all, and we can unite, even in our differences and amid developing change if we choose to stop comparing ourselves, cease judging others, and eliminate the belittling.
You are enough.
And so here we are. The tornado of change can’t stop, won’t stop. The storm will always come, probably at the worst time ever (vacation, anyone?) But with these tools, you can prepare to be an effective beacon in the midst of the turmoil, guiding your ship into a safe harbor. Find your support, find your fight song. Send away the negative energy, the too-muches, the comparisons.
You’ve got this.
now read…5 Ways the Military Family Evolves