Holiday co-parenting as a military family can sometimes feel like a juggling act. With deployments, unexpected moves, and always-changing schedules, it’s easy to let the stress pile up. But fear not, fellow chaos manager! You can make co-parenting during the holidays smoother and more enjoyable with a little planning, communication, and flexibility. Here are five ways to get on the same page and make this season as joyful as possible for both parents and kids.
Plan Early (Yes, It’s That Important)
Co-parenting is a team sport, and that means planning ahead. If your spouse is deployed or away for training, try to work out a holiday schedule early. Who’s taking the kids to the in-laws? Who gets Christmas morning? Making these decisions well in advance can reduce stress as the holidays approach.
Pro Tip: Use a shared calendar (Google or Cozi) so both parents are on the same page about the holiday schedule.
Keep the Communication Open
Remember, communication is key. If you’re feeling overwhelmed with all the holiday prep, let your spouse know. Whether they’re deployed or home, they might not realize the extent of what you’re juggling. If you’re feeling pressure from relatives, don’t hesitate to voice it—open communication helps you both feel heard and supported.
Pro Tip: If your spouse is overseas, try a quick video call or a voice note to stay connected and update them on the holiday plans.
Let the Kids Help (And Make It Fun)
Make the holiday season a collaborative effort with your kids. Let them help with setting up decorations or wrapping gifts. Involve them in the holiday traditions, even if that means getting creative with what you have on hand. This will make the season more meaningful and less stressful.
Pro Tip: Create a holiday “to-do” list for the kids to help with, making them part of the excitement rather than another item to check off.
Don’t Overdo It
It’s easy to feel the pressure to have the “perfect” holiday. But as a military family, you’re already juggling a lot—so don’t over-commit. Be selective with what you say “yes” to, and make sure your family’s well-being comes first. Whether that means skipping a few events or not going overboard on presents, prioritize what truly matters.
Pro Tip: Learn to say no to certain events if it’s just too much. It’s okay to take a step back and say, “This year, we’re keeping it low-key.”
Get Creative With Celebrating Together
If your spouse is deployed, create new ways to connect. Set up virtual holiday dinners, make care packages with festive treats, or plan a post-deployment holiday celebration when they return. Getting creative with how you “celebrate” can make up for being apart and still create lasting memories.
Pro Tip: Schedule a special holiday activity for after your spouse returns—having something to look forward to will help make the wait more bearable.
Teamwork Makes the Holiday Dream Work
Co-parenting through the holidays doesn’t have to be a chaotic, stressful experience. With early planning, open communication, and the flexibility to roll with the punches, you can make the holiday season enjoyable for both you and your spouse. And remember, the holidays are about making memories—not perfecting the details.
Fam, you’ve got this! Share these tips with your fellow co-parents and let’s make the holidays less stressful and more fun. Together, we can handle anything—deployment, distance, or holiday chaos!