As this year comes to a close, (it’s insane that we are already done with October!!), I believe it is the best time to look back on the past year and reflect.
Reflect on the good and the bad in your personal and professional lives. I know for myself, this past year has brought so many new challenges, many that I was unprepared for, that I am still learning to accept and grow from. Everyday brings new challenges and opportunities only if we chose to look at it that way. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason, and sometimes it may take a while for us to appreciate what that reason was.
Many times when we seek to change our perspective on a situation, it is because we have previously had a negative mentality towards a situation or person.
Depression with military spouses is not uncommon, but I believe it is often ignored and can be thought of shamefully. It can be lonely constantly having your loved one separated from you when you can do nothing but wait at home for their safe return.
It can be challenging to continue on with life without your significant other at home, especially during the holidays.
I personally find myself constantly envious of couples who get to spend every night with their loved ones or who get to enjoy the small things in life with them. A large majority of my relationship has been distance, that I have accepted and am now used to but it can be very challenging to see everyone’s joy on social media and know that my loved one is not here.
When I think of changing my perspective on life and on the past, I believe it is those times of envy or depression that can truly help elevate a person to a healthier mindset.
My personal goal towards the end of the year is not to envy other’s joy, but to celebrate with them. Everyone has good and bad days, and those of us in military relationships have days of loneliness and depression. Some are just better at hiding those emotions.
We all deal with the stress of being alone in times of need and not being able to get ahold of our loved one because of a training exercise or a deployment. I know personally I have to stop looking with envy and instead with admiration of the joys and struggles that everyone goes through.
As we look back on this past year we should look back not at the time lost, but the time gained with our loved ones.
The fact that our wives and husbands made it back safe and alive. There are so many amazing things to look forward too with life, big and small that it make the rough days worth it.