Part 1: Helping your Soldier Prepare for Ranger School
Part 3: Welcoming your Ranger Home
So, your soldier is off! You’ve done all you can to prepare for Ranger School and the day is here.
With a lot of hard work and even more luck they may be home in just 60 days, unfortunately that is not very likely. Less than 10% of soldiers make it through all three phases of ranger school without getting recycled (basically starting over…) Recycles really suck, but it is an important part of the process. I am sure by now you have learned that flexibility is an important trait to have as a military spouse, and Ranger School is no exception. My husband recycled once, but knew several guys who recycled 2-6 times! My husband always says, “Hope for the best, but expect the worst.”
What NOT to do
- Since recycling is more than likely, do not make any important plans that can’t be changed close to his “original” graduation date. For example, do not plan your wedding or a non-refundable cruise the week after they are “supposed” to graduate.
- Do not send them contraband items. I tried to sneak my husband MRE coffee packets in one of my letters and the Ranger Instructor checking the mail was not impressed…
- Don’t send risqué pics. Instructors check mail!
- Don’t bring up stressful things that aren’t time sensitive. Don’t ask if he wants to start trying for another baby or tell him that the washer cost $1,000 to fix. That can wait. For emergencies call the Red Cross phone number: (877) 272-7337
What TO do
- Join your soldier’s Facebook Ranger School page for updates. This is a very helpful tool!
- Look up: [your soldier’s class] Ranger School Class Group
- Your soldier will send you a post card with his current Class and Company for mailing (see link below for addresses)
- Follow the mail guidelines
- If your soldier recycles, you will need to update his Class and Company
- Send as much mail as possible. They only get mail once a week and it’s a huge morale booster if they get a big ‘ole stack! Have family, friends, and his unit write him, too. Send him letters, pictures, drawing, anything that reminds him of home! Print memes, send song lyrics he likes. Do you water paint? Send him one. Do you have kids? Have them make cards. I love to press flowers, so I sent flowers in all his mail, because that’s what home looks like for us! Make sure to laminate pictures. Or wrap them in scotch tape.
- Soldiers get one call every 3 weeks to tell you if they passed that phase or not. Make sure you are available. It can happen as soon as Thursday evening and all the way through the night, so keep your ringer on.
- If at all possible visit during Darby pass! This is the only time you can visit them until they graduate. You don’t know the next time you’ll see them. Getting to see my husband for 8 hours was amazing for me and lifted his spirits so much. Just 8 hours together made him feel like he was home and reenergized him to finish strong. When visiting bring a baggie full of additional letters (but keep sending ones via main too!) and any extra supplies he may need.
- Soldiers who make it through Darby have a Friday pass. Recycles have a Saturday pass. Try and get a flight that arrives Thursday and leaves Sunday. They will not know if they passed the Darby Phase until Thursday night, so you need to be available both days.
- Head back to the training area an hour before the pass ends. We missed one turn getting to the base that set us back 20 minutes. If they are late they will be dropped!
Stay Sane
- You need to keep busy. Join a gym class. Volunteer. Set up weekly play dates. I picked up a second part-time job. Don’t hermit up in your house—you will go crazy! If you don’t have a support system, find one.
- Every time you miss him, write him a letter.
- Hope for the best, expect the worst.
What’s next?
This can be a long process, but it will be worth it in the end. Hopefully this course can bring you and your soldier closer together. There is something really special about relying solely on letters to communicate. It will go faster than you realize and once he’s home you’ll think, “Huh, that wasn’t that bad.” You may not believe me now, but you will. Come back next month for: Part 3: Welcoming Your Ranger Home
My Soldier’s Time Line
- RTAC – 2 weeks
- Darby – 3 weeks
- Darby – 3 weeks
- Mountains – 3 weeks
- Florida – 2 weeks
- Airborne – 3 weeks
- Days gone – 119