Living With Both PTSD And ADHD as a Military Spouse

The similarities between PTSD and ADHD

Let’s first discuss the similarities between the two conditions, Attention Deficit Hyper Activity Disorder (ADHD) and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

There is a widespread misconception that only children suffer from ADHD or ADD (without hyperactivity), and it must be diagnosed in childhood. The truth is, many children are misdiagnosed and only learn about their symptoms when they become an adult and seek out services for co-occurring concerns.

While ADHD and PTSD have similar characteristics, the reason for each behavior differs and includes:

  • Distraction
  • Restless
  • Inpatient
  • Impulsive
  • Anger
  • Sleeping problems
  • Poor memory
  • Poor concentration
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Low self-esteem
  • Addiction
  • Poor concentration
  • Shame

Diagnosis Each

Before being diagnosed with PTSD, a person must show symptoms associated with PTSD for at least a month. The problem with diagnosing this in children is their systems are often relevant and directly connected to their development and maturity levels.

Many parents/caregivers just see it as behavior or environmental problems and assume they will pass. I hear it all the time in my natural environment as a parent, “children are so resilient, they’ll be fine.” The problem with that logic is it presumes that the trauma that the child has experienced will resolve itself…which is false.

PTSD symptoms experienced by can be classified into five categories:

  • Re-experience of trauma in the form of flashbacks or nightmares
  • Exaggerated emotional and physical reactions to events
  • Increased level of arousal with difficulty in sleeping, concentration, and exaggerated startle response.
  • Inability to regulate or express a range of emotions (Anger, Fear, Sadness, etc.)
  • Display extreme control issues in an attempt to manage their environment to protect them from a perceived future trauma

On the other hand, an ADHD diagnosis is through a comprehensive evaluation of the patient by a pediatrician, psychologist or psychiatrist with ADHD expertise.

A person’s inattention or hyperactivity-impulsivity must be chronic and long lasting to receive a diagnosis (though children are being diagnosed today at an alarming rate and at a younger age).

PTSD symptoms can easily be mistaken for ADHD, emotional or disciplinary problems. The signs can also be missed entirely in well-behaved children and high functioning, driven adults leading to a delay in diagnosis until they experience an “episode” or it starts to interfere with daily activities. It’s for this reason I wasn’t diagnosed until I suffered a severe response to my drastic and abrupt departure from the military.

PTSD develops in people who have witnessed or experienced a traumatic event like, shock, warfare, sexual assault, near-death experience, severe physical, mental, or emotional abuse as a child, or extreme environmental factors. Fear triggers changes in our body (fight-or-flight response) to defend and avoid danger.

The Misdiagnosis

Despite the various medications and therapies, family and community support plays a vital role in the diagnosis and treatment of each disorder. I didn’t come from a family of good listeners (though they would beg to differ). Asking for emotional and mental support wasn’t something children asked for from adults, because honestly, the adults were in need of it for themselves. I was always a very driven, focused, and opinionated child. That’s why as a therapist, I always encourage family counseling for anyone diagnosed with either, it’s critically important.

Some of the things I was diagnosed with and treated for:

  • Adjustment disorder – prescribed therapy (refused meds)
  • Anxiety Disorder – prescribed therapy and Xanax
  • Depression – prescribed therapy and Wellbutrin, Effexor, and Prozac

After studying various anxiety disorders extensively during my psychology undergraduate program, I began to understand my own symptoms and suspect that I may be suffering from some degree of childhood trauma. As an active duty service member and a military spouse to the same, I wasn’t sure what such a diagnosis would mean for my career. In the late 2000s, traumatic disorders weren’t discussed or accepted as they are today; I feared being labeled as “unfit.”

Here are the steps I took to free myself while living in silence with (2) untreated mental health disorders:

First, I accepted what was. I had to deal with the fact that my brain functions differently from that of other people, and task that most people accomplish with ease would take me a little more time, energy, and effort. I also had to deal with the fact that I brought childhood trauma with me into the military, that was exacerbated during my service to the military…which later was termed “compound trauma.”

Next, I had to develop a routine that required minimal “feeling.” Being in the military made this part easy for me in a lot of ways. The repetitiveness and ritualistic patterns we tend to follow in the military helped tremendously. As a female service member, one would often be labeled as a troublemaker or an unreasonable person if they expressed anger, fear, sadness, or any inability to thrive (regardless of the environment).

This put me in a position where I was able to “shut up and color,” meaning…do the job, complete the mission, and don’t worry about how you feel.

This mentality took me down a very wild and reckless path when I was off duty (if there’s such a thing). Then there were the difficult moments, the random shift changes, deployments, detachments, cross-training, extreme multi-tasking, etc. Those were the times when my adrenalin would be in total control of my life!

To stop, think, process or feel was not an option…I was on autopilot for most of my military career, and despite the extreme turmoil going on inside of me…I achieved exceptional levels of success under those conditions.

The Diagnosis Finally Comes

In late 2006, it was time for me to hang up my chevrons and enter the next phase of my life. It was during my routine military separation physical that I was finally diagnosed with both, PTSD and ADHD, and adjustment disorder. I was totally blown away, not by the diagnosis…but by what triggered the onset of it. I later received the diagnosis of PTSD – Compound trauma as a result of childhood trauma and repeated military trauma.

Let me be clear, most people who experience trauma do not develop PTSD. Nevertheless, those who have gone through interpersonal trauma, child abuse or rape will likely develop PTSD compared to people who have experienced non-assault trauma. An adult is more likely to develop PTSD after a physical trauma than children, especial those under the age of 10.

Hindsight, I realize that I indeed displayed symptoms of both, PTSD and ADHD as a child. My caregivers overlooked my symptoms, and I was often labeled as the “rebel” of the family. I was speaking loud, but in a language, no one could understand.

With the help of medication, cognitive therapy, and a strong supportive military-friendly environment I was able to manage my symptoms, marry, have children, start a business, and live a productive, and prosperous lifestyle. I no longer take medication to treat my symptoms, but I do maintain a mental health routine that includes therapy, exercise, meditation, writing, and spending time with loved ones.

Develda Edgington, MA-MFT
Disabled Veteran, Military Spouse, Mother, Business Owner, Survivor

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Develda Edgington, MFTI: Develda L. Edgington, MFTI Founder and CEO, DLE Enterprises, LLC Personal Development & Leadership Training www.develdaedgington.com info@develdaedgington.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/develda.edgington Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/develdaedgington/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/girlzonfireinc Periscope: @girlzonfireinc LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/develda-edgington-ma-mft-i-04963bab
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