Ever lived in a place so long you knew something weird was growing, somewhere?
Better yet, have you moved into your brand new military quarters and found an insect hanging out that clearly wouldn’t have passed a cleaning inspection upon move-out, but here you are, moving in?
That’s our lives as military spouses. The work never ends. In the words of those who don’t walk in our shoes, suck it up buttercup. No. We will not be sucking it up today.
Today, we are making our house a happy, safe, and clean home. Even if that means fighting with housing for an extra air filter. Here’s a list of 10 things you need to clean or replace in your military home, ASAP.
1: The secret insect and animal hideouts
There are a plethora of crevices and vents for our little unwanted friends to inhabit. If you don’t have a grate blocking your external dryer vent, you may want to check for birds and other animals. This can be hazardous and make your dryer not function as efficiently as it should. Pull out your fridge, stove, and dishwasher. Behind these appliances, if not regularly tended to, animals can breed for generations.
2: Breathe clean air, all year long
Did you know some housing companies offer free replacement accessories for their residents? At some Army bases, they have what’s called a self-help location where you can obtain replacement air filters, light bulbs, and even touch up paint for your home.
3: Hey Karen, the decor on your front porch needs a bath
The spider webs, birds nest, and mushroom village indicate that your porch could use a little TLC. Use the water hose and spray it down regularly. Pull the weeds, and check for any nests that could have been erected in the area.
4: Why is it so hot downstairs, you ask?
It’s because the batteries in your thermostat died two weeks ago, and you haven’t figured it out yet. A quick tip: Using a pencil, write on the inside of your thermostat every time you change the batteries. This way, you’ll get a sense of how often they need changing.
5: Have you seen the movie, The Ring?
If you don’t clean the hair out of your bathtub drains, this will be your reality. Not really, but you know what I mean. Unscrew the drain, pull all the gunk and hair from it, pour some drain cleaner down there and voila, no more clogged or smelly drains.
6: If you’re not already grossed out, look inside your garbage disposal
The old food that’s rotting in there would make anyone hurl. Fill your sink with hot water, add some vinegar, fresh lemon slices, and baking soda, pull out the stopper and turn on your disposal. This will eliminate the funky odor escaping your drain.
7: Toilet rash anyone?
If you don’t want to have an itchy bum when you move into your new home, I suggest you get scrubbing. A little Lysol goes a long way.
8: Slime water isn’t very tasty
Soon after moving into your new home, changing the refrigerator water filter is a proven win, win. You’ll have fresh drinking water and you know exactly when the filter was last changed.
9: Are those frosted windows I see?
No, the previous residents left you a welcome gift. It’s a layer of dust, mixed with a couple of dead flies and old cobwebs. Grab some heavy-duty glass cleaner, lots of paper towels, and get to it. Quick Tip: Clean the windows when the sun is not so bright. This will allow you to see the streaks better.
10: Walking on a clean floor is everyone’s life’s goal, right?
Prior to your move-in date, the home should be cleaned and ready for your arrival. But is it really? You’ve got everyone from leasing agents, inspectors, and maintenance personnel entering the home. Giving a quick sweep, mop, or vacuum may be all you need. But if not, you may want to steam clean your carpets and scrub those floors. If you have tile flooring, mix bleach and water and let sit in the grout lines for about 45 minutes or so, then scrub with a brush. This will make your floors look as good as new.
Moving into your new home should be an exciting time. New adventures, and a new life. Tackling the chores shouldn’t be a downer. Put your hair up, turn on some gangster rap and handle it like a boss. A little bit of elbow grease goes a long way.
Afterward, treat yourself because you’ve earned it. But shower first…