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Keeping it Real, in a Fake World!

Develda Edgington, MFTI by Develda Edgington, MFTI
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We commonly use the term “Keeping it Real” when we are being honest about a situation or person, even if that truth offends some people. As we go through life, learning, and growing from your experiences…it becomes easier and easier for us to get side tracked and fall into “comfort zones” which unchecked can lead to us falling into the trap of “that’s how everyone else is doing it”.

These easy steps will help you “keep it real” even in a world that’s full of fake!

Keep in mind the things that matter to you. We are constantly bombarded with messages and images giving us permission to sacrifice our integrity, identity, and many other things for a temporary gain. Hold on to those thoughts, messages, and things that are real and true to YOU…those messages that serve to make you a better version of yourself. The television and media are constantly setting and changing the standard for what’s acceptable and what isn’t. WHO ARE THEY? You’ve heard it used time and time again “They say,” “They say, if you eat this, drink that, do this, do that, you’ll live longer.” To this day…I still don’t know who THEY are! Don’t be afraid to say the things that need to be said; don’t be afraid to feel what you feel. Practice emotional intelligence when it comes to Keeping it Real,” because not everyone will like it or be ready for what you bring! That’s alright, accept that people are different…and still choose to DO YOU!

Challenge your thoughts and beliefs, all of them. Challenge every thought and belief you have about yourself, especially if thinking and feeling that way is incongruent with how you fell inside. Do an inventory of the things you say to yourself, the childhood messages that have become adult baggage. Challenge it all, and if it no longer serves you in this life…in the current space you’re in…DELETE it! We are all carriers of a message, that’s our contribution to our families, society, etc. So be careful what radio frequency you tune in to in your head, for those are the messages that will enter your heart and pour out through your life.

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Show up and be your authentic self, everyone won’t like or accept you…so what! When you show up as your authentic self, you give the people around you permission to do the same. People who keep it real (good or bad) are usually respected a lot more than people who pretend to be something they aren’t. The person that shows up and says “I really don’t like you and/or what you stand for” is usually more respected than the person that showed up and pretended to like and agree with everything being said. The former person kept it real and made a decision not to override what they were feeling on the inside. This is by no means permission to be rude and inconsiderate of others feelings; it just gives you permission not to always be agreeable.

Don’t forget the rich history of your experiences, the good and the bad. We often try to package up our negative emotions and experiences, tuck them neatly in the corners of our mind/life…and pretend they didn’t exist. Newsflash, they DID happen, they DO exist, and they are a part of your journey. Earlier I mentioned challenging messages and things you tell yourself, yes…do that, but don’t pretend they didn’t happen. Over the years, you’ve evolved and hopefully become a better version of yourself. Remember your heritage and the experiences that have shaped the person you have become. Change is great and necessary to be truly successful in life. Just don’t put your old life in a box and bury it before you actually deal with it and process it. Doing so, will lead to you pretending to be someone you’re not and you’ll have unresolved feelings…leaving you incomplete. We can acknowledge and grow from our past experiences, without being defined by them.

Keeping it real is not just a cleaver saying we use when we want to be honest with someone without seeming rude or offensive. Keeping it Real is a way of life, and it should be the standard we set for ourselves daily. You are the next celebrity; we may never have another Mother Theresa, Dr. Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, etc. You are the next great Leader, the new Celebrity. You can only do this when you show up in the world as your authentic self, and Keep it Real…even in a world full of fake!

now read… heavy hearts in Chattanooga

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