Two weeks ago, we were given a heads up that our district was turning Monday into a staff day in order to allow teachers to prepare lessons in case it turned out that we would be out of school for a while.
Within 24 hours from that initial email we were told we were going to still have staff day, but it was to prepare because we would be closed for at least two weeks. The third email came out late Sunday night. Planning day was cancelled. Only people who needed to come pick up personal materials to help get through the next two weeks would be allowed in the building. Schools were being set up as feeding spots for students to grab breakfast and lunch to take home with them if they needed, but only essential administrative and cafeteria staff would be allowed in the building.
It was starting to hit us that social distancing was taking over.
After the first week at home the principal sent out an encouraging email. Teachers were still meeting with each other and trying to get kiddos to check in. We were all under the impression that an extension was coming for this time out of school, but we would be back before the end of the year. I don’t think any teacher in Virginia was quite prepared for the news we got on Monday.
At 2pm on Monday our governor declared that schools will be closed for the remainder of the year. While people are making snide comments at how much teachers must be celebrating getting to start summer early, the truth is we are heartbroken. Teachers, for the most part, love their jobs. Look, no one becomes a teacher for the money. We do it because we love our kiddos. We love helping students. We want to be in the classroom, laughing with our classes, engaging in conversations about literature and history and doing hands on science experiments and having sticky hands in elementary school tap on us to show us silly new skills. Our students, they become our kids.When people ask me if I have kids, I say I have 85 and I mean it.
My mental health as we get deeper and deeper into social isolation is shaky at best. But now that I know we are not going back to school, my worries are not about myself. I know I am not the only teacher who is worried about their students.
Worried who isn’t getting food.
Worried who is being hurt at home because they don’t have a safe space, school, to escape to.
Worried about who is having to grow up too fast in order to help take care of younger siblings since parents still have to work.
Worried about who is being abandoned at home alone too young because there is no one to watch them.
Worried about who is taking care of kids that have questions about the crazy things going on in our country.
I already worry every day about my kiddos, but now, those worries are growing. This morning, I had 10 students sign on for live teaching hours. I almost cried being able to see their faces. I never thought that the Friday we said goodbye to them would be the last time I saw them. I never imagined not walking back into my Harry Potter-themed classroom full of 7th graders practicing the newest TikTok dance during breakfast. I am the teacher that cries every year on the last day of school because I feel like my babies are growing up. I never even got to say goodbye to them this time. There is so much more I wanted to teach them, not about 7th grade English skills, but about being good humans, about being compassionate to students that are different than they are, about growing up and dealing with challenges.
Please know that your kids’ teachers, they love your kids still. They are worrying about these changes. Hearts are broken for the seniors who they won’t see at prom or graduation. The kindergarten graduations that won’t happen. The yearbook pictures that will never be taken. We are sad we don’t get to celebrate growth with our students and finish the year with kids we have grown to love over the past six months.
I know that right now everyone’s lives have been turned upside down. I am thankful that my time in the Navy taught me to adapt and overcome, but not everyone is able to do that easily. I know parents are frustrated by having to become teachers overnight and students are moody about not being able to go anywhere. I know students often think teachers live at school and have no emotions beyond what is shown in the classroom, but the reality is that teachers are just humans. Humans with huge hearts to love all their kiddos, even the challenging ones. And right now, we are hurting at not being able to meet every need that is out there for our kiddos.
I can’t speak for all teachers, but I probably speak for a lot of them when I say that we are here for you. We want to teach our kids and help them in any way we can. We are learning right along with them how to navigate digital learning and adapt to a much less structured educational environment. We still WANT to do our jobs. We want to be the support for your students that we have been all school year. We are just asking that you be compassionate and understanding in this time of chaos. Like my coffee mug says, teaching is a work of heart and all of us have our hearts in the right place moving forward. Helping the kids is what is on all our hearts right now. So please, help us do that together. Be a teammate with your kids’ teachers. Work with them as they reach out to you. Let them do their jobs so you can love your kids instead of loathing their schoolwork.
