Honestly, I think it is because, for the first time in many years, I have stepped outside of the military spouse community. I have not left the community. I still write about military spouse topics on a weekly basis. I am still giving advice to spouses who reach out to me. I am still a member of the American Military Spouses Choir and perform with them frequently. I am still very much involved.
But something has shifted over the past couple of years. I also own my own business that is not related to military life at all. I also perform with other groups not associated with the military. I have many mentors and friends that are not a part of the military community.
I will admit to initially feeling a little out of my element away from the military spouse community with these endeavors and relationships. How would they ever understand what I am going through? Would we be able to relate? Would I know how to function outside of the “expertise” I had gained about the military spouse life? Would I have anything profound and important to offer the world outside of that bubble?
And the answer is, yes.
A million times, yes.
I never understood military families who said, “The military is just his (or her) job. When we are at home, we are not a military family. We don’t live on base, we don’t attend functions…we need a break from it all.”
What do you mean? Military life affects the entire family. It’s weaved into the fabric of our lives from where we live to how much time we get to spend together. Plus, the military community, in my experience, is filled with some pretty remarkable people…why wouldn’t you want to be a part of that?
I still believe all of that, BUT, I now see their point.
We all need a break from military life.
Because what happens when you are too involved? What happens when you are living and breathing military-life culture? It can become too much.