5 Lessons I Learned From Cooking My First Thanksgiving Alone

'I, I have no idea what I'm doing,' he said as he held the knife in the air. 'What do you mean, ' you don't know what you're doing ?' 'I mean, I've never done this before and I have no idea how to do it.' 'Well, you just slice it,' I said calmly. 'You slice the turkey,' I added as though I had any clue what I was doing. The truth was, I had no idea how to carve a turkey any more than my husband. We stared at one another and then turkey for a while, as though it were some sort of foreign alien resting on our table. 'I didn't think it would be this...difficult,' he said sighing, running his hands through his hair. When I turned to look at him, his eyes were filled with fear and frustration. I giggled a little bit as he turned to me. 'What? What is so funny?' 'It's nothing. It's just, you're training Marines and you look a heck of a lot more frightened of that turkey than a heavily armed enemy camp.' He flashed a smile at me. 'That's because I can outwit the enemy. It's hard to outwit a dead bird. A delicious dead bird, that is.' And with that, we turned to the Internet which had surprisingly good instructions on how to carve a turkey. The internet was pretty much our answer for everything that year: pregnancy, babies, turkey. Our first Thanksgiving away from home as a married couple wasn't exactly National Lampoon fodder, but it certainly wasn't Martha Stewart perfect either. When it comes to holidays, the military can be a double edge sword. If our spouse is away for the season, it can feel nearly impossible to get into the festive spirit. But these are also the times where we may strengthen our bonds with friends and family as we rely heavily on them to pull us through. Once our spouse returns, there is much jubilation. Yet all too often, the next duty station will take us miles and miles away from those very same friends and family and the following holiday may be spent missing those same people who propped you up the year before. It can feel impossible to, well, have your 'turkey' and eat it, too. But, these are the times when it's up to you and your spouse to fill the home with magic-no matter what state or country you're in. This is how my husband and I found ourselves in our first Thanksgiving alone. Our daughter was only two months at the time and the thought of taking a sixteen-hour road trip was out of the question. I had never cooked a Thanksgiving dinner; up until that point, my idea of helping at Thanksgiving involved opening the cranberry jelly and sliding it out onto a plate. But, determined to make our rented house feel more like home and prepare a dinner that recalled the spirit of Thanksgivings past, I set out in a Clark Griswoldian journey to create the most festive, homey, memorable Thanksgiving ever. I didn't fail outright, not at all. But I did learn quite a few lessons that year that I will carry with me in the future. 1. Never buy a turkey that is too big to fit in your fridge/freezer. Unless you've got serious backup, (like, say, a neighbor's fridge or the funds to buy a temporary ice box), don't buy a turkey so big it won't fit in your fridge or freezer. A week before Thanksgiving, I spent some time perusing through multiple turkey recipes. Finally, I found a five star recipe with rave reviews that required a brine the turkey overnight. So, the day before Thanksgiving, (mistake #1) I went out and bought my turkey, a corresponding pan and all the necessary ingredients. When I got home, I filled the pan with salt water and went to put it into my fridge. It wasn't until that moment that I realized there was no way my fridge was going to support that turkey. Despite the fact that there was only going to be two of us eating the turkey that year, I bought a turkey roughly the size of the ones my mother purchased when she cooks for twelve (mistake #2). Needless to say, I went a little bit overboard. Thankfully, my husband discovered a way to move a few shelves around and fit everything in the fridge in Tetris like perfection. We got lucky. Now, I am always careful to eye that turkey before purchasing so I don't run into a similar situation. Especially this year, because our fridge shelves don't move! 2. Prepare Some Dishes Ahead Of Time Why oh why didn't I heed this warning before? Many traditional Thanksgiving dishes can be prepared the day before. This serves a number of beneficial purposes. First, it frees up your time on the actual day to, oh, I don't know, SPEND IT WITH YOUR FAMILY. And second, unless you have three ovens, it's likely you'll be getting up at 3:00am simply to ensure every dish has an opportunity for a chance to cook. Pies are good dishes to make in advance. Even casseroles can be pre-assembled, so all you need to do is throw them in the oven and let them cook at any point, thus freeing up your time. My first Thanksgiving, I ended up waiting until the last minute to cook all my dishes, so predictably, by the time I finished baking my side dishes, the turkey was a solid room temperature. 3. Don't by shy! Even if you're new in town, Thanksgiving is a great opportunity to open your door to new friends. Our first Thanksgiving we spent with new friends and neighbors and it was a wonderful way to liven up the holiday. It was also an opportunity to learn about other's traditions, some which I thought might be nice to include in upcoming years. With the group of us, it felt like a party. That year we had such a feast, we could barely fit everything on our table. The best part? Our friends are vegan, so despite me feeling guilty about having a giant turkey ( my goodness, would I offend them? I didn' t), I was able to sample some really delicious dishes I would have never thought of before. It also gave me the opportunity to try and cook something I had never had so we could share our food, as well. That said... 4.Test out exotic recipes BEFORE the holiday : I am not really the world's greatest cook. It's not that I don't enjoy cooking, it's just not my passion. I have tried for years to get more interested in cooking, but I would much rather nail together some furniture or paint a wall than try and attempt to make a soufflé. However, I do get excited about trying new things. When we hosted guests that were also vegan, I had the opportunity to try out a couple of new vegan friendly recipes. However, I hand't thought to do a test run, so the three side dishes I had planned to prepare turned out to be one side dish. I needed more than one trial run in order to perfect the dish. Now, whenever I'm going to try something new for a guest, I plan on trying it out a few days in advance. 5. Don't be afraid to make the occasional mistake, it might become your new tradition . Like I said, Matt and I had no idea how to carve the turkey. I guess both of us assumed the other would just instinctively know how to do it and could teach the other. But, it didn't work out that way. What was great, however, is we were able to learn how to do something togehter, and now we have started our own special custom of how we carve the turkey. Some of the best, most genuine traditions are created by trial and error and mistakes! Work to combine both your and your spouses traditions, but don't hesitate to make room for new ones! Do you have any other Thanksgiving tips? Be sure to share them in the comments! Connect with us on Facebook!

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