As Christmas lights are hung and holiday music blasts from speakers in every store, there is a common theme to the season: family. Watch any holiday movie and it’s clear that this is a time to be together. For many military families, this means traveling long distances to visit the place you call home. Excitement builds as the trip approaches, and though we know better, we pack our expectations along with our suitcases. Once again, we prove the saying: expectations don’t always match reality. Whether it’s your first trip home or your tenth, be on the lookout for these four expectations.
Expectation: It’s a vacation!
Reality: Let’s be honest, not all trips are vacations. When you take a vacation, the idea is to relax, have fun, and return to your normal life feeling a little more refreshed. Visiting home for the holidays rarely accomplishes that. Your days will be filled with family traditions, activities to entertain your kids, and trying to make up for lost time since your last visit. You only have a few days of leave, so you need to use every moment you have. Restful will not accurately describe your trip.
Expectation: You will catch up with all your old friends!
Reality: Life does not stop during the holiday season. Like you, many of your friends have moved away, gotten married, and have families of their own. Many people still work their regular hours. Family commitments and sickness will derail plans. If there is someone you want to see, let them know you will be in town. Surprise visits make great viral videos, but they can quickly backfire and leave you feeling disappointed when they don’t work out how you hoped.
Expectation: You will get a much-needed break from parenting!
Reality: Anytime you travel with kids, there is extra work at some point in the trip. In the days before you leave, you have the extra task of helping them manage their excitement. Travel takes exponentially longer. Even if the initial trip goes smoothly, you know you must repeat it in a few days. Hopefully the people you are visiting try their best to let you rest, but even grandparents reach their limits. When it’s time to return, you have kids that are overstimulated, out of their routine, and upset about leaving.
Expectation: It will be hard to say goodbye to family!
Reality: When you are lucky enough to have family and friends that make it worth the planning and effort to visit home for the holidays, it is always hard to say goodbye. That part never gets easier. Home will always hold a special place in your heart, especially during the holiday season. However, your definition of family has adapted. Being a military family means that you create family wherever you are. You know that wherever you go, you will always be saying, “see you later” to one family and reuniting with another.